By Olivia Stringer
You’ve probably heard of Sugar Daddies; (usually) older men who pay beautiful younger womxn in cash and lavish gifts in exchange for their company and (often) in exchange for sex.
You’ve probably jokingly tweeted about needing one to support your PrettyLittleThing addiction and then been flooded by messages from ‘Sugar Daddy Steve’ and ‘Dr. Sugar’. They probably claimed that they would send you $3000 a week if you first sent them a $50 attorney fee or some other suspiciously vague sounding payment.
(FYI this is a FAT scam. Please do not try this at home).
But what about Paypigs? Paypigs it seems are the mysterious cousin of the Sugar Daddy, the oddball who sits alone in the corner at parties, listening to their own music via some obscurely branded headphones. Urban dictionary defines the term Paypig as ‘a submissive, almost always male, who has consented to financial servitude towards his Mistress’.
Paypigs pay their ‘Mistresses’ or ‘Goddesses’ in exchange for things such as verbal degradation and humiliation. Sometimes even in exchange for household chores like cooking and cleaning. Paypigs also often enjoy being referred to by derogatory terms such as ‘slave’.
For many of us this situation seems unfathomable; a man giving you money so that you will let him clean your house, sounds bizarre right? Paypigs often state that they enjoy being financially ‘drained’ but are the womxn who receive money from these men exploiting them? And what do the Paypigs themselves get out of this arrangement?
Paypigs: ‘domination is therapy’
A Paypig whose twitter username is @loserpiggy271 explained to me that their reasoning for engaging in this behaviour was that they have a very stressful, high powered job in which they are always in control. Thus, being ‘drained’ by their ‘mistresses’ allows them a complete role reversal; this is one aspect of their life where they can be completely dominated.
It seems that @loserpiggy271 sees being dominated by their ‘mistress’ almost as a form of therapy. This appeared to be a common theme across all the Paypigs that I spoke to. Sexual dissatisfaction from spouses also appeared to be a recurrent theme.
Freud has suggested that masochism, (i.e. pleasure derived from pain or humiliation) is a means of exaggerating a passivity towards sexual desire. He suggests that this is caused by a sense of guilt or of castration anxiety. Freud stated that ‘the pain thus overcome joins the disgust and shame that had acted as resistances to the libido’ (Freud, The Psychology of Love, Penguin, 2006). This basically means that those who enjoy masochism do so because they feel ashamed of enjoying sex, or because they do not feel worthy of it. Thus, this presents us with an alternative explanation for this extraordinary practice.
Womxn seen as superior
This concept is reinforced by the words of @slavepiggy8, who told me that he is a virgin as he does not believe that he is worthy of having sex with womxn. “I see women as superior and have so much respect for them. I know it’s not ‘normal’, but I feel women should be served and treated as queens. Seeing superior people happy makes me so fulfilled and happy myself”, he told me.
“I think they [the womxn who he serves] see me as pathetic, but I don’t mind, I accept who I am.”@slavepiggy8 on Twitter
When asked whether he was concerned that womxn were just using him for money @slavepiggy8 answered “I know they are but it’s fine, I’m a slave and I enjoy being used”. This Paypig also added that he prefers cleaning for womxn rather than just sending them money as he likes to feel like he is being useful.
After an eternity of womxn being treated like the slaves of men, could the phenomenon of the Paypig be a welcome change to society?
Benefitting from Paypigs
I spoke to Ellie, a 22-year-old student who receives money from Paypigs, in order to find out more about her experiences.
“I got into it by accident”, she told me, “I’ve never gone looking for Paypigs, they’ve always just approached me by messaging me on Twitter. Some of them literally just want you to block them and then send an ‘unblock fee’, It’s wild honestly”.
However, Ellie stated that she is personally uncomfortable with being cruel to her Paypigs, even if it is what they desire. She prefers instead to dominate their conversations, for example, messaging them to demand they send her money or pay for new clothes.
Since the coronavirus pandemic began to sweep the globe at the beginning of this year, many people have found themselves out of work. Thus, with the prospect of dressing up to go and spend two hours in a restaurant pretending to be transfixed by a balding 65 year old Sugar Daddy seeming like a little too much effort, many womxn are beginning to use Paypigs as a source of generating income.
Although from the outset it may appear that there is exploitation involved in this practice, after gaining a better insight into the world of Paypigs it appears that for the most part both parties are receiving an equal amount of satisfaction from the arrangement. This wrongly perceived exploitation is misunderstood by many who cannot comprehend that Paypigs could possibly gain anything from this arrangement. However, it is an eye-opener to the diversity of kinks/fetishes which exist in our society.